Dear Readers,
Good afternoon, and welcome to Off The Fence, a newsletter of some renown. Now, we thought that Issue 23 was really quite good, but you should read the following recommendation from new reader, Michael Auerbach: ‘Hear me out: The Fence is hands-down the best magazine out right now. And I say that as someone who loves Monocle, The Economist, and The New Yorker. The Fence is just on another level. Brilliant. Huge thanks to Patrick Radden Keefe for the recommendation.’
If that doesn’t make you want to subscribe (for as little as £25 a year), then what will?
The magazine continues to be seen in all places fashionable – enjoying the view at Ha Long Bay; in Venice (Italy); titillating a certain floppy-haired playwright in Dublin; on the Hedgehog Highway and with a Guinness in north London, which is the sort of situation that we rarely find ourselves in. Keep sending these snaps through and you can win that sparkling prize – either tag us on socials or send one to editorial@the-fence.com.
Capital Letter continues to delight, with George Pendle, editor-at-large of Air Mail taking to Twitter to encourage people to sign up for the ‘contrary cultural criticism you don’t get elsewhere.’
Last week’s outing was our most popular yet, and we’re going again on Thursday. Do join us.
This week, we’ve got tips across the board, but we’ll look to Hereford first.
Beware of the Blades
Even in the current newscape, yesterday’s Panorama documentary was truly shocking. Former serving soldiers in the SAS and SBS allege that their fellow soldiers committed a number of horrifying war crimes in Afghanistan.
Our own insider piece about working alongside the SAS, published five years ago, clearly delineates how they operate in an accountability-free zone.
Despite the launch of an inquiry, our sources are confident that justice will not be served in any meaningful way. Too many senior figures are implicated.
There is a concurrent investigation into more recent special forces conduct in the Middle East. One complicating factor? The SAS were given a ‘kill list’ of British jihadis to ‘take out’ in the fear that ISIS fighters would return to these shores. This story, when journalists are able to investigate it fully, will be even more shocking still.
Sir, a Second Link to ‘Hold the Phone’ Has Hit OTF
That’s right, for those of you who missed it, there’s another chance to read one of the strangest and funniest pieces from the latest issue. On 9/11, thousands of confused, sad and, crucially, horny men sought to process the strangeness of their emotions by texting what they thought was a sexy young nurse at the end of a premium rate sexting hotline. In fact, they were exchanging sweet nothings with a 21-year-old man in a Kings Cross basement who was feeling much the same as they were. He tells his particular angle on that fateful day in the brilliant ‘Hold the Phone’.
I Think You’re a Misogynist Dinosaur, A Relic of the Cold War
It has been announced that the next head of MI6 is to be a woman, a case of cold reality following screen fiction. There is a shortlist of three women, two of whom are spies. We are told by our spooky sources that the current deputy director general is the one who will get the job.
First-Person Adventures
It’s callout time again. As we look ahead to the rest of the year and the wide-open flatplans before us, we turn to you to ask: what’s your story? First-person essays from inside various worlds, scenes and conurbations are fast becoming our favourite features to run. In Issue 23 alone, we had insider scoops from stories from the world of modern sex work, the asylum system, the kidnap-for-ransom industry, and the scuzzy heights and seedy depths of noughties indie – all of which were written by practitioners, not pro writers.
We want more of the same, please. If you are anyone, anyone at all, with an interesting occupation or pastime, we want to share everything there is to know about what you do & who you are. You do not need experience. You do not need by-lines. You don’t even need a clean criminal record, and in many ways we’d prefer it if you didn’t. Send your story to editorial@the-fence.com, and let’s work on something together.
New Kid on the Block
Dispatch is a new magazine fuelled by frontier spirit. It publishes deeply reported features and interviews from across the world.
Recent stories include a dive into San Francisco’s techno-utopian party scene, TF's Róisín Lanigan on Morden's pigeon racers, and an account of an apocalyptic Easter with David Icke.
Coming up this week: an essay by the great Marco Roth, reflecting on life after New York. (Move over, Lena Dunham.)
Subscriptions are still free. Get in early.
Take a Page
Would you like to reach 27,000 pairs of eyeballs? As you can see, we are open for advertising in this newsletter, and you can peruse our rate card here. All you need to do is send an email to the editor at cb@the-fence.com and we’ll take it from there.
Alright, Still?
Alan Hollinghurst, Geoff Dyer, Lily Allen and 297 other literary types flocked to a gallery in Mayfair to celebrate the launch of Leo Robson’s novel The Boys. There was no ice behind the bar and only one functioning toilet, but a lavish cheese board was provided. A wonderful time was had by all, and long into the night.
You can read an excerpt from Leo’s book on our website here, and there’s also a rave review from Alex Clark. Do buy the book here.
Please Help Me
Last week, we asked you if you knew of a public figure with an egregious amount of personal assistants. One of you wrote in to tell us that the late architect Zaha Hadid had five. Five! Kim Jones could never.
Pulling Up Roots
Sluicing another jewel of Issue 23 your way this week: this spectacular dispatch from the desi dancehalls of London’s suburban fringe, attended and celebrated by TF debutant, Ciaran Thapar.
Two-stepping through the history and persistence of these cherished cross-cultural club nights, Thapar spotlights the impact of legendary dub figures like DJ Kullar and Vedic Roots in keeping the flame alive through generations, in a piece that will make you scratch out your weekend plans and head to Southall. Read this wonderfully evocative feature for free (for now) right here.
London Noir
Making magazines in the sunshine is, as you’d expect, thirsty work. So thirsty that, within weeks of the spring heatwave, we all acquired crushing debts with our favourite vintners, Emile Wines – debts we are now striving to pay off with some good, honest advertising. Let us tell you the bottle we’ve been swigging from recently: the 2023 La Plante Pinot Noir from buccaneering Burgundian winemaker, Claire Naudin.
Ruby, ripe and all the better for a bit of chill on it, this is a warm-weather wine of the highest order – pure sunshine juice, light enough to please everyone you’re pouring for, with enough Gallic complexity to impress even your haughtiest Jancis Robinson acolyte. All of Naudin’s wines are worth a sup or two (her lemony Aligoté blows minds), but this is a pinot you can pour all summer long.
Joe Public and his mates will have to pay full price for a bottle, £34 – but you, cultured reader, can get 15% off with promo code: EWXFENCE15. Buy one, buy six, buy twelve, buy today. This discount code applies to the whole of Emile’s stock, so maybe get one of those Aligotés in, too.
But Wait, There’s More!
We don’t talk enough about how sick our tote bags are, so allow us to address this omission. Our tote bags – available in two colours, three designs, styled by our art director Mathias Clottu – are so good that you’ll want to use your Daunt Books bag for dog waste, and your New Yorker tote for scrubbing down stained countertops. They’re £12 and gorgeous, and your life will be a little more complete for owning one, we promise. Buy one right now, and stick a single issue – or a map of Liverpool – in your basket while you’re at it.
Should you be looking for places in which to flaunt your newly acquired tote (you did buy one, didn’t you?) we now also have the Capital Letter: our reliable guide to London’s finest pastimes, free and fortnightly for now; weekly and paid in the imminent future. Take a look at our last edition, which shone a light on the city’s best theatre shows, exhibitions, fancy meals and churches. Sign up today, and you’ll be getting our next mailout in under 48 hours – just in time for the balmy weekend ahead.
In Case You Missed It
Hettie O’Brien on Stephen David Jones, the gentleman tax crook who charmed the moneyed classes and swindled millions from his clients.
Jia Tolentino on why her brain finally broke.
Patching things up with estranged siblings is tough. Tougher still, writes Serge F. Kovaleski in this extraordinary NYT piece, when said brother is The Unabomber.
Jaya Saxena on how food collaborations no longer make any sense, and aren’t meant to.
Johannes Enevoldsen has built a clock that tells you the exact time via a different literary quote each minute.
And Finally
‘If you go home with somebody, and they don't have books,’ John Waters once wrote, ‘don't fuck 'em!’. As bookish swots ourselves, we’re duty-bound to agree with cinema’s Pope of Trash, and would go further in judging any potential suitors on which books they choose to own and display.
The art of discerning someone’s worth from the contents of their bookshelves – we might coin Pluteomancy for the practice – is as old and storied as the printed word itself, and this week we revisited one of our favourite examples of the form; Andrew Male’s exhaustive study of Eric Clapton’s Bookshelf.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QFiYTs7EWsU
Glimpsed in the background of three separate interviews – and one photoshoot – across an entire decade, many of the shelf’s meagre offerings are funny in and of themselves, such as an elite guide to Europe, or two – count ‘em, two! – copies of a book showcasing the art of England cricketer Jack Russell.
But it’s the deeper currents that Male finds in the art books of Chagall and Picasso which may well stay with the viewer long after watching. Never has so much been gleaned from so meagre a library.
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We’ll be back on Thursday for those of you who’ve signed up for Capital Letter, which you should do, to be honest. It’s excellent and it would make us feel good if you did. Buy a magazine or tote bag here, or a subscription here. You do want us to feel good don’t you? If you’d like to speak to us about an order, a pitch, or simply comment on the lovely weather we’ve been having please email support@the-fence.com. Sloths can hold their breaths longer than dolphins.
All the best,
TF